So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
I filled this oven with as much Pizza as I could, and I've been eating out of it for three days.
Just ate the last piece. Refilling the oven.
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
Just told my dad about my heroic mailbox showdown. He looked at me strange. I think he thinks I'm high.
You are high.
Randomize