Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
Just managed to stab myself in the ass with a fork. I feel that as my best friend, I'm obligated by friend code to inform you of that sort of thing.
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
Randomize
