I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
Whose surfboard did we steal and why is there a wood carving of a pelican in the fridge where the beer used to be?
I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
I know he'd never cheat on me. It'd be like choosing Mexican tap water over Patron.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
I might volunteer to give breath samples on the 17th where I would be required to get drunk and then give samples! THE POLICE WOULD PAY ME AND PROVIDE THE ALCOHOL!
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
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