He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
You rang?
Saw a ginger and the first thing I thought of doing was yelling "you have no soul!" so I called you so we can yell it together with you on speakerphone.
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
He's not actually Jewish. Turns out he just wears the yarmulke to cover his bald spot.
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
I'm determined to sit on that face.
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
Lynn just told me "I heard about your divorce. Condoms or morning pill your choice and I'm buying". Sorry but I got plans now bro.
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
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