So he says "lean over this" which is a chain across the doorway, held into the wall with bolts. I do. Then he puts his weight on top of me to try and get it in.
It breaks. We fall.
I now have a broken nose, a concussion, and an infected, split lip. Why do I have the worst luck in guys?
Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
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