I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
I cam home to find him twitching on the floor, surrounded by unopened condoms and covered in cranberry sauce (yes I tasted it) while Thundercats was playing.
Randomize
