If you die in college, do you die in real life?
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
DON'T BE A PUSSY. ONLY 1/3 OF THE WORDS IN YOUR LAST TEXT WERE MISSPELLED, WHICH MEANS YOU NEED 2/3 MORE SHOTS.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
whose ass print is on the piano?
Threw up on the baby. National Tequila Day is the eve of National I'm A Horrible Nanny Day.
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
Is it ironic that our divorce court is a block from where we had our reception? Or is it just sad? Alanis has confused my understanding of irony.
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
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