Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
I'm pretty sure I have jizz on the back of the dress I wore to church. Awesome.
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
I just recognized Courtney in a crowded Trader Joe's solely by seeing her ass. In other news, I survived the first round of layoffs today.
I'm not sure which feat is more impressive...
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
Randomize
