i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
Vanilla vodka + chocolate soymilk does NOT equal an epic milkshake.
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
Tornado booty call.. dedication
There are two types of people in this world I don't trust: people who collect stamps, and people who don't drink
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
Randomize
