Have you finally orgasmed yet?
hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
Remind me to tell you about the dream where im a fighting a super hero whose only weakness is sunkist.
I was pretty stoned. I thought I needed a seatbelt at the restaurant.
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
Best case scenario: sex with hot bartender \nWorst case scenario: no sex and punched by tattooed guy that may or may not be said bartenders boyfriend.
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
NO I WILL NOT SET YOU UP WITH MY TWIN WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?!? JUST BECAUSE I WONT BLOW YOU DOESNT MEAN YOU CAN STALK HER AS A BACKUP PLAN YOU SPANISH BASTARD
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
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