I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
He did plead exhaustion. And I made him push through it. I am like the motherfucking badass football coach of sex.
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
Randomize
