Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
I wasn't interested in him...but then he played The Office theme song on acoustic guitar. I'm sorry.
It's too hard to jack off and hold an ipad at the same time
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
Bruce the cab driver wants to take me on a date to see Taken 2
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
He caught me shoving meatballs into my mouth using my hand. Fuck utensils. It’s Christmas...and this is why I’m single.
They are good meatballs.
Look fucker, my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
Randomize
