so explain again why im purple
no
You fell asleep mid BJ last night. I put your pants back on you. My ego is pretty bruised this morning.
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
My mascara kind of smells like tequila to me...Is this my body crying for help or asking for a shot?
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
Randomize
