Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
omg he fucking fingered me this morning. and i was just like this is the most awkward alarm clock ive ever had
Any day you don't mysteriously wake up in the garbage is a good day.
Currently emptying half-full wine bottles from fridge into my mouth and refilling with water for later. Drunk survivalist recycling!
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
Randomize
