kristin has been a bad kristin
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
people at meijer look at you funny when you have 37 bottles of champagne in your cart.
I puked in the urinal of a bar tonight. Not embarrassed cause I got away with it, legitimately upset you weren't there to make fun of me.
This santa hat i wore to the bar, served it's dual purpose as a vomit bag.
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
Two options. One, you listen while I freak out. Two, we have mediocre to awesome car sex and don't talk. Either way, I'll be there by 7
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
Randomize
