we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
He told me to pick a safe word. I said 'cactus' and he said I wasn't taking this seriously and that I wasn't cut out for s&m.
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
I think I just accidentally agreed to become a surrogate for a gay couple
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
If you gave someone an std. would you say a muffin basket, a candy gram or an edible arrangement is a better choice to send them?
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
Randomize
