It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
Just say you're the husband at the front desk to get in. She's in room 15 at the ER.
what? who is this?
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
im currently assessing the tequila situation in preparation of your arrival
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
I seriously just drove by a man walking down the street wearing hospital scrubs, an 80s track jacket, gold necklace and carrying a flute.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
So you drank bourbon with cough syrup?
I still had a cough. It only makes sense
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
Randomize
