he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
I'm drinking away my Christmas cash. People are going to get bar receipts as presents.
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
According to facebook, I opened up a can of whupass on some douche who poured all the vodka on the ground.
You called the wrong number but I salute you.
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
Randomize
