STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
woke up next to her writing my name in some journal. apparently she makes every guy she hooks up with sign out.
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
Randomize
