People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
apparently i walked up to the counter, put $30 worth of snacks next to this girl, and went 'uhh i have no money'
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
bouncer thought i was tryin to get the license plate numbers of strippers to stalk them. I had to go show him where I threw up to get back in.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
I sent him a cookie cake that said "Congratulations you're not a father"
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
you scattered cereal all over the floor so you could "re-trace your steps and figure out what happened." 20 min later you yelled about the mess and let the dog in to clean it up. 5 min after that you screamed since the cereal was gone. you suspected me and locked me in the bathroom so i could "think about what i'd done"
and you bit everyone who tried to let me out. no more tequila for you. EVER.
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
Randomize
