me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
Housekeeping called in a homicide detective. Just spent an hour explaining that we had vigorous hotel vacation sex five times, even though I was having a heavy flow day. It'll definitely be what you call a memorable honeymoon.
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
So it's official the pockets of my work apron exist solely for the purpose of secretly flipping off asshole customers and not losing my job.
WHY DID HE INTRODUCE ME TO HIS MOM? CAN'T HE JUST HIDE ME LIKE EVERYONE ELSE I'VE EVER DATED?@!
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
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