Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
I think the waitress doesn't beleive I have friends coming. I've had 4 drinks and a large salad just waiting for you guys.
I gave you a 45 minute blowjob. You were inside me for 3 minutes. I'm going to need you to get your shit together.
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
Randomize
