For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
Randomize
