oh, also, we're locked out of the house and we're going to have to take shelter with the hot, poss single, dad next door. i hope this turns into a porno
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
She sprinted out of the bathroom and ran all the way into the middle of the street. Five minutes later she came back with a banana nut muffin. She's that kind of drunk.
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
My card got declined when I tried to buy dippin dots at 2 am, the lady gave them to me for free because "I looked like I needed them."
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