I'll pay for our taxi if you let me makeout with the drummer and we don't leave RIGHT when the bassist does.
So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
came home to a trail of roses from the door halfway up the stairs. but my nonsingle roommate lives downstairs. idk if they celebrated on the stairs or if some girl tried to woo me last night and i don't remember
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
Just got a ride from a stranger while walking a mile home as it hailed with no coat. He asked me if I smoked, then said he just made some potent cookies and I could have one.
The cookie was what I originally wanted to tell you. Always say yes to drugs from strangers
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
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