he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
Randomize
