I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
Joe is yelling at the trees again.
It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
Im playing the how drunk can i get before my card declines game. being single sucks. But getting drunk after work alone in fridays on a wenesday night sucks way more.
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
I just washed my birth control down with captain because I don't have any water and I need to wash the blood off my face before I leave my room.....
Remember when I said I had my shit together?
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
in mid sex he pointed out my great gatsby tattoo and we started discussing themes and metaphors from our fave fitzgerald novels
you need to stop fucking English majors
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
Randomize