I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
So I fucked him. Then I MC Hammer'd to the bathroom, where I did the robot in celebration of my accomplishment. And then I spent 10 mins fixing my toilet. But YOLO.
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
Randomize
