You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
I just shaved my "bikini area" into a fucking pizza slice
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
Randomize
