dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
if your leaving for the weekend then im farting on your pillow
they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
... thanks for letting me perform minor surgery on myself last night.
I figured if you were smart enough to sterilize with vodka, you could handle it.
Just saw a 300lb woman fall down. Shes screaming like a beached manatee. Her 120lb boyfriend is trying to push her up. It's like watching an infant try to bench
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
You know we had a good night last night when today I opened up my Google Translate application and the language is set to Persian and the phrase to translate is "I want you to suck my dick".
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
That moment when your fucking in an airport bathroom and forget to lock the door. That poor man...scarred forever...
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
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