Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
How much weight does it take to launch a cat using a trebuchet vs the tension required for a catapult?
I told two kids in their homecoming outfits to use a condom because of Ebola. I may have saved a life last night
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
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