I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
Porn is love you can see.
have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
There r osticjed everywhere
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
Many a woman has been in tears over the passing of my penis' whorish ways.
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
Dude, you were so drunk you were hanging from the ceiling of my car pretending you were a sloth while we were on 81.
All I ever wanted was my bed, Tylenol, and total darkness. Instead I had a pervert with porno posters who blares german rock calling me tootsie pop. How was your saturday night?
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
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