my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
His gf just liked my changed relationship status. She's gonna shit bricks when she finds out he left her for me. Bless her little heart.
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
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