found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
I told her she can't come to our bonfire because she throws up on herself & she has a mustache. And now apparently I'm a bitch or something.
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
I wish I could have seen the drive thru woman's face after " May I please have 20 Mcflurrys.....and a large diet coke, I'm trying to watch my weight for bikini season."
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
Did you leave a mouse under my pillow again?
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
Randomize
