Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
She just texted me that she's horny, then started quoted random music, then telling me everything she regrets. I don't think there's enough tequila in the world for me to deal with her...
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
Randomize
