Words i added to my t9 today: gnomes, facebook, and chlamydia.
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
he fucked my hip out of place.
Do you know how much wine is in a box of wine? Not so much an amount, but whether it will kill me if I drink the entire box this xmas
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
Holy shit I'm 26! That took an embarrassingly long time to figure it out, I need to keep buyin weed from this kid
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
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