weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
I bought a dress specifically for face plant durability... this is how serious I am about my drunk status this weekend
Passive mediator is your role in this relationship. My role is dick punching arsonist
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
His gf just liked my changed relationship status. She's gonna shit bricks when she finds out he left her for me. Bless her little heart.
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
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