Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
At first I was confused when I woke up with shards of glass and pickle brine in my pants. But then I remembered I hung out with you last night.
My New Years Resolution is to come up with a new resolution monthly. January: decrease my shotgunning consumption speed to 7 seconds or less.
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
that may or may not have been my penis.
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