3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
He's coming back with me for the week. It took me saying "I don't wanna drive myself home... I'm better as a passenger giving road head" for him to jump at it. Rack another one up for my magical openings.
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
How bad would it be to ask my maintenance man for new blinds because the dude puked on those too?
Dude. Where are you? There's a hot chick drunkenly dancing on the bar and aggressively taking shots to Pink songs. She looks like she needs a rebound. Get. Here. Now.
FUCK NYC TRAFFIC.
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
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