next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
You also thought the cure to hiccups was drowning yourself (and you were right)
That tingly feeling you're experiencing in your lady parts is my mustache. All the ladies of America are waking up feeling the same thing. You're welcome.
Well you fished my watch out of a possibly vomit filled toilet so I think we're bros now.
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize
