God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
Hey man your outta milk
How the hell do you keep getting in my apartment?!
You were walking around with a baby carrier pretending your vodka was a baby. You tried to get pictures on santas lap
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
Love that I’m sending my uber driver a thank you message for taking me home via mcdonalds tonight before I’m messaging my date from tonight! Lol
Randomize
