No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
There was a half eaten cheeseburger on my coffee table. Guess I made it to McDonald's.
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
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