Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
Tell me again your tentative move date. There are 5 Russians in my apartment on ecstasy and they are having a rave in my living room. I can't. I need to move stat
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
Randomize
