Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
Hiking for a first date sounded like a good idea in theory because there was absolutely no possibility of me blacking out. In practice, I'd rather black out than go through what I just went through.
tell him if he brings over dinner you might let him see your left boob...or right, whichever you prefer. But under no circumstances do you let him see both...unless he brings a good desert...like coffee ice cream or something
Randomize
