Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
I'm dying. Please wear something slutty to my funeral.
well..after leaving the bar you handed me your wallet and said you didnt need it cause you were going to find the cash cab and added 'i'll see you on tv'
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
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