It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
His pick up line was "your one sexy pumpkin, I'd love to carve." Why would you let me go home with him?
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
It is. We should just be drunk all the time forever everything is like just 90% more perfect
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
Anyone would get lost in that field after that much vodka. Trust me... I kind of feel like superman considering I even made it home. Most people would've been face down in a random oilfield. Not this guy.
He stopped me mid-blow job to say that his new year's resolution was to stop hooking up. MID FUCKING BLOW JOB.
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