The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
Oh god I just had an orgasim riding my bike. I need to get laid pronto.
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
Randomize