i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
So i banged this chick from Peru last night. Needless to say, I'm having chipotle for lunch todayas a south American reward to honor her.
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
You know you gotta reevaluate your life when the first thought that comes to mind after you wake up is 'at least I'm still alive'
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
Randomize
