I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
i just had sex bonerless
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
Ur keys r in ur purse. ur purse is on the couch. ur cigs r on ur front seat. u drank all ur wine. mollie took ur jkt bc u cockblocked her. and in case anyone asks, the saints won 31-17.
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
Randomize
