and that's when the elephants and penises started dancing on the ceiling
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
Oh my goodness please please please my inner slut needs some pampering, shes getting rusty and nothings worse than a rusty slut
I think mark twain said that originally
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
I woke up in a cornfield to shouting, a bottle of Jim Beam, and a bunch of mc muffins. If this doesn't scream Illinois, idk what does.
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
I'm both gender and math confused
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
Randomize
