We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
Washing the last semen-stained shirt you have really solidifies a breakup. It just got real.
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
my dad is now demonstrating how to start a fire with a tampon. happy fucking new year!
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
My mom just walked in on me naked taking a shit and packing a bowl...the only comment she makes is, she wants her Tupperware back after my pot's out of it. Best mom ever.
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
Randomize
